August 27th, 2003

drink coffee

Just My Luck....

Walked outside to see Mars, it's suppossed to be at its closest tonight around this time...and the sky is "overcast"...no clouds at night almost nearly the past two weeks...tonight...can't see a darn thing!
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    CNN Daybreak
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I Don't Know About You, But.....

I'm a little sick of seeing all those religious lunatics in Alabama whining about that commandment monument in that courthouse. It violates the separation of "church and state" by being there...just another instance of all the idiots that believe that ancient work of fiction is fact trying to force their insanity on those of us that haven't been brainwashed by such nonsense....
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    Fox News Live
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I Hate Unnecessary Interruptions...

Sitting in the recliner, all comfy, having a couple drinks, watching Woody Allen's "Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Sex(But Were Afraid To Ask)" on Flix, and get a knock at the door. An older woman working for Kilpatrick Funeral Home looking for my mother. I tell her my mom lives next door, but is at work, and probably won't be home till around 4 this afternoon. She then tries to sell ME on a "pre-arrangement" funeral plan. I tell her I plan to leave my body to science after I go, can't see wasting valuable land space just to put a carcus in a box there. Don't think my mom would be interested either, since I already know she already has a plan with the largest "rival" funeral parlour in town. Not sure what she thought, me answering the door in just a pair of shorts (me in the shorts, not the door)...

Think I've been "alone" too long though...woman appeared to be in her early 60's at least...and I think I might would "hit it".....
drink coffee

A Few More Jokes...In Lieu Of Anything Better To Post...

IMPURE THOUGHTS
Little Johnny was taking confession, when he told the priest he was having impure thoughts about his sister. "Is this a sin, Father?" he asked. The priest nodded and said, "Yes, Johnny, indeed it is a sin. Look at the two beautiful brothers you have!"

FOUR ANIMALS
A teacher asked her class, "What do you want out of life?" A little girl in the back raised her hand and said, "All I want out of life is four animals." The teacher asked, "Really, and what four animals would that be?" The little girl replied, "A mink on my back, a jaguar in the garage, a tiger in bed and a jackass to pay for all of it.

THE DISCOVERY
A little girl is talking to her mother and says, "Mommy, I just found out our neighbor's son has a penis like a peanut!" The mother is in shock, but tries to keep her cool. The mother says, "You mean it's small?" The little girl replies, "No, it's salty."

OLDER WOMEN
Q: What does an old woman have between her breasts that a young woman doesn't?
A: A navel.
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